The press (miming aside), have been almost universal in their praise. Upshot? Queen of Pop comes back to reclaim crown. Gaga who?

Much whipping of excitement, just before an album launch. My, how convenient. But of course it is. Madonna has always been a master manipulator. Even more Machiavellian than the Dark Lord Cowell himself.

So what was so genius about the performance?

If you ask me, not much. The sheer spectacle and staging were impressive. But her marketing masterstroke? A youthful shot in the arm for her tired, fading brand / star (delete as applicable), courtesy of the young guns.

LMFAO. Nicki Minaj. MIA. Cee Lo Green. And the bouncy internet superstar gymnast. Quite the supporting cast list.

By appearing on stage and paying their dues to pop’s Queen, they send word to their legion of fans. This old-lady star is worthy. They extend to her their own credibility. Their cool. The sneaky and subversive message to their younger fan base.

Look at me performing with Madonna. This is a woman I love. And you should too.

It’s one of the commodities she craves the most. That and an Oscar for film. But let’s be honest. That’s never going to happen.  So, for my money, here are marks out of ten for the performance.

• Likelihood the album will go straight in to number 1 in many countries: 10/10
• Jay Leno ad: 7/10, for being relatively amusing
• The guest stars: 9.5/10, very well cast. All played their supporting roles exceptionally well (short of getting on their knees and chanting ‘we’re not worthy).
• The miming: 2/10, because after all the practise, she should be a hell of a lot better at it than that
• The dancing: 5/10, as she’s starting to look like she needs cod liver injections into all moving joints that haven’t been filled.
• The surgery: 4.5/10, because it’s starting to get more than a little creepy
• Likelihood Gaga will do something massively outrageous to try and reclaim headlines: A very tiresome 10/10
• The macrobioticness: 0/10. S’just too try hard…

Iain G. Morrison remembers the scene from In bed with Madonna where they all joked about Madonna still writhing about to Like a Virgin at 50. Oh how they all laughed….

‘That’s all i ever wanted. A country full of clean bums’.

‘

Baby wipes for adults bums. Fair enough, nothing wrong with that.  And don’t get me wrong. I’m not anti-infommercial. Far from it. They’ve not been in fashion these past few years and the FMCG crew have been investing in them again. Which usually means cha ching.

We Brits don’t generally do them quite as ‘HOOOO YAAAAAH’ as our friends from across the pond. But botty wipes? Poor love. She’s only ever going to be known as the arse wipe lady…

Iain G. Morrison has a clean derrière. And will not be starring in a botty wipe infommercial any time soon…

Hard and fast?

Get the blood pumping, rocking Bee Gees soundtrack, no kissing, ‘hard man’ Vinnie Jones guide to CPR? All adds up to a rather blistering ad for the British Hard Foundation.

Best ad of 2012 thus far. Saving lives and providing smiles. And the use of a tongue in cheek hashtag ALWAYS gets igmorrison’s vote…

Iain G. Morrison is head of marketing & communications for London’s leading social enterprise. And is a lover of all things #hardandfast

Yes, I said hamsters…

An amusing little spot from Kia. Certainly made me smile, but certainly wouldn’t get Kia on my consideration list when I’m looking for a new motor. And thanks to the über talented (and design obsessed) @commsgeek for sharing…

Iain G. Morrison is a senior marketer for a leading social enterprise. And might have a script idea for Terminator IV…

Favourite line: ‘My name is Madonna and I’ve not been relevant in five years’…

Pre-packaged pop is the musical equivalent to junk food. Often fills, rarely satiates. I’d rather have me an Adele / Winehouse sandwich…

Iain G. Morrison is the head of marketing for leisure’s most succesful social enterprise. And if he were a betting man, I’d have a fiver on Madonna being gutted Gaga came along before she had a chance to launch Lourdes…

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Iain G. Morrison actually does get paid to spend time on Facebook. So take that Diesel…

 
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@igmorrison's new man bag...

Elvis and Kresse create luxury accessories by recycling waste. They have a fire-Hose range (made exclusively from genuine de-commissioned British fire brigade hoses) which had they not stepped in, were destined for landfill. The lining? Military grade recycled parachute, of course.

So far, so good. But it gets better.

50% of their profits from the fire-hose line are donated to the Fire Fighters Charity. Social enterprise doesn’t always have to be about grass-roots initiatives, it can drip with luxury as well…

My order was placed after 5pm Thursday (one man bag, one matching wallet). When I tweeted to ask when delivery might be, I was told Monday. They even checked to see if I’d be home to accept delivery, and suggested it’d be better to deliver to the office instead to ensure I got my hands on the goodies as soon as humanly possible? What service!

Delivery came around 11am today. Which now means I need a weekend away to use my lovely new overnight bag…

Iain G. Morrison is a Head of Marketing & Communications for a charitable social enterprise. And will no doubt be buying more bits from his good friends over at Elvis and Kresse…

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Since then we’ve had random punters singing with Pink in Trafalgar Square, a pretend Royal Wedding dance off (a la that wedding dance from the Americans), and now T-Mobile are hijacking the knock down castle game to end all knock down castle games.

Angry birds…

I love angry birds (and I don’t mean the ones in the T-Mobile call centres). But this?! All the Saturday night TV ooooooohs and aaaaaaaaaaahs. The forced excitement, the jumping and cheering in unison?

It’s faker than David Cameron offering up a pledge to protect the NHS…

Iain G. Morrison is a Head of Marketing & Communications for a charitable social enterprise. And will be sticking with Angry birds on’t iphone ta very much…

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For those that haven’t heard of them (and shame on you!), the School partnered with the University of Arts London Awarding Body to create a new Diploma in Communication Arts, which is written by the advertising industry. Here’s hoping that stops them moaning about the standards of young talent coming through. The curriculum is wiki based, constantly updated & improved by the school’s network of industry mentors. And exceptionally talented students.

If you’re a student, forget sticking your head in a book for three years with no access to industry big wigs. If you’re thinking about trying to break into the industry (and it can be a real slog, particularly in the current climate), students are given the opportunity to work on live (and portfolio) briefs in a real life agency environment. Veritable book making gold. You’re not too late, applications are open for the next intake…

Although it costs more than most other advertising schools, there are several tangible benefits. A guaranteed internship at the end of the course. Structured learning. Real on the job experience. And of course, rubbing shoulders with adlands finest week in week out, chance after chance to wow them with your thinking…

The standard of the work was exceptionally high. More over, the students literally hang on every nuance of every word of feedback you give them. Some of the thinking (both strategically and creatively), was client ready. There were also a couple of campaigns I saw that wouldn’t have been out-of-place at awards ceremonies. Don’t believe me? Go in and spend some time mentoring yourself!

I managed to review a few of the students portfolios. The piece I am sharing with you this fine day appealed to my rather warped sense of humour. The student in question got quite the introduction.

‘Meet Nathan. He draws lots of cocks’.

Poor Nathan tried to explain where he garnered his appendage loving reputation. After a few minutes floundering, he finally relented and showed me his response to the Toblerone portfolio brief.

Enjoy…

The chocolate loving Iain G. Morrison would recommend you find a morning, afternoon or full day to mentor at the School of Communication Arts 2.0 

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Many of those that know me assume it stands for gin, as I have something of a fondness for that tipple. (A bottle of Chase will do nicely if anyone’s buying).

So, to a rather lovely spot a talented artist / Brand manager friend brought to my attention this fine day. Aldi; clearly not my supermarket of choice, but I do love this latest spot in their current campaign. And if the next 30 years aren’t kind to igmorrison…

Iain G. Morrison is a gin loving head of marketing…